Menace To Society

The time has come. The 'Social Network' Movie. Another couple of weeks. I have to say, I can’t wait for this movie to open. I wasn’t this excited to see something since 'Wanted'. The thought of James McAvoy pressing on Jolie's lips was just too much to withstand.

But 'Social Network'...?

No Jolie and no McAvoy, but everything I like in a story; a true story, rise from nothing to everything (well, in their case, it was more like rise from plenty of it to the unattainable), converting passion into colossal success; and naturally, everything that follows in such scenario - jealousy, crossings, double crossings, followed by personal and legal combat of epic proportions. Yay.

See, this subject interests me intensely. As a person who’s known for my networking and connecting A and B for the purpose of achieving and creating valuable ventures; it amazes me how few of those actually worked.

All my life I’ve been connecting people with ideas with people with money, and vice versa; and one side almost always blew it. The reasons were various; lack of focus, unable to see it in vision, doubt, lack of work ethic, and not willing to invest enough time needed for any project to see the light of day.

And mostly it was the - “I just can’t believe that would actually work.”

I’m over-eager to see a story of someone who actually thought something he created in the dirty dorm room CAN actually work. Even more, I want to see how he convinced people that make it happen, it WILL work.

That’s the hardest part. Convincing someone your idea is worth their while.

I’m not as much into the subject of the movie and the company, as I’m into seeing how the whole process worked.

Facebook doesn’t impress me much. I’m impressed with their idea and passion, and the actual business they created. Even though it’s based on one man that couldn’t get laid to save his life who thought of a “project” that might get him laid. Pathetic and impressive, all at the same time.

Let’s get to Facebook and why am I not a fan of it. Because is stupid. Or people on it made it stupid? I can’t decide. It's like an online portfolio of the worst in people, displayed out there for all to see. The stupidity, materialism, low self-esteems packaged into - I just wanted to share my latest achievement, illiteracy, poor grammar, you continue the thread.

Every day I get on it, and I flinch.

What Zuckerberg forgot to do (among million of other things he forgot to do) is to not allow everyone to get on it. He should have done some pre-eliminatory IQ test before you can sign on. A placement test, as you have in college. If you can not write properly, you can’t get on Facebook. Step away from the computer.

Who needs television, when you have Facebook? There’s a comedy, there’s a tragedy and there’s utter horror. I have a couple of favorite, horrendous things on Facebook:

Praise.

Mostly women do this. You don’t see or hear from them for 4 months, they post nothing, and then one day you see the status out of the blue: "I just love my rich boyfriend who just bought me a Porsche, and he’s so great and lovely, and I love him soooo much, thank you my lovely love love! " There’s never, ever an actual picture of the guy. Just things.

Pictures.

Pictures are the real treasure of Facebook. They show us how people perceive themselves. Like when they put pictures of Hollywood legends on their profile pics. This bitch literally thinks she’s the essence of Marylin Monroe in her circle. There are also friends that encourage this lunacy. It’s funny to do it for a few days or some time, but when Marilyn Monroe, Brigitte Bardot, or Robert De Niro is your profile pic all the time, for years, what is wrong with you? No, I do understand it, and there’s just no way that is funny, or a metaphor, or there’s anything remotely cute about it, however you might explain it to yourself. It’s one thing to put Megan Fox’s face on your profile; putting a legend is another pair of pants. The one you do not need to put on.

Comments.

I love the comments part. I could live off of comments on Facebook. People that comment on pictures are truly priceless. The way they shamelessly lie is unreal. You see pictures of women looking like they’ve been thrown out of a tsunami; but under their pics, you will almost all the time see the parade of - "O my god, you are soooo beautiful, you should be on the cover of Vogue, you are so pretty it’s not even real, you should be a model!". Or my favorite one: a busted-looking woman with unbearably huge fake lips and naturally light hair she dyed brown and her friends in the comments saying - “O my god, you are the spitting image of Angelina!” These are not your friends. Get new friends that will give you a dose of reality, that’s a true friend.

Spelling.

It’s scary how many people are illiterate and even scarier how many of those do not give a shit about it. I love it when I see let’s say - a businesswoman, well in their forties, who promote their businesses 24/7, post links of their new ventures, but they can’t spell right. Typo is one thing, it can happen to any of us. Being illiterate is a whole other ball game. The even more amazing part is that they’re not even embarrassed about it. Edit it, and fix it! Nah, not an important part, the yacht pics from the Maldives or Caribbean are more important. Who cares where - . , ; ; - and space go.

Statuses.

Silly idiotic retarded, unnecessary, irritating statuses. Unless you are an A-list Hollywood star, why do you think we would want to know what you had for lunch, when you woke up, or when you shit? Yeah, I don’t mind knowing what Eva Longoria ate this morning. You? Sorry.

Quotes.

I love quotes. I have been collecting the ones that speak to me for my entire life. But for christ sake please don’t share the mundane ones we heard in elementary school. Put some effort in it, find some that are deeper than the - “It’s not what’s outside that counts, it’s what’s on the inside” - first popin' in 1000 b.c. If you don’t have the mental capacity to share something of real value to your audience, maybe don’t do it. Yes, of course, people share things for themselves, and not the audience, people’s profiles are their private profiles and not Huff Post, I’m aware, but if I’m subjected to reading: “If you can't handle me at my worst, then you sure as hell don't deserve me at my best”, the dumbest, mundane quote of all times on the daily basis from women that think this makes them gangsta, then I can write a piece on it.

Like.

Like Like Like Like Like Like Like. Let me get this straight, you like my status, then you like someone’s comment on my status, then you like my response to the comment on my status, then you like your own comment on your response to my response to someone that responded to my status, and you like his/hers respond too? Lord. You liking everything and their mother dog and parrot makes your like, guess what - worth NOTHING.

Invitations.

Games, groups, events. If you live in some forsaken place, and I live in Los Angeles, and you know that and see that attached to my name, sending me invitations for your events in the forsaken city over and over again, where is that taking us exactly, except in mental institution?

Flirting.

Illiterate and idiotic flirting in the messages. If you’re missing a couple of teeth, listen to folk singers, can’t spell or punctuate, have a few dozen women-hating statuses, please don’t send me “hey beautiful” in the subject. Which part of your presentation is appealing?

Association.

People posting pictures from Cannes, St. Barts, and so on, standing in front of the Louis Vuitton store, or standing to a random Ferrari they saw on the street and whipped the camera out. Explain, please? What am I looking at? Your ability to find a luxury car on the street, or an LV store somewhere in the world? Why are you posting that pic? Does proximity with Ferrari equal some kind of success the rest of us don't understand? What are you, a successful international Ferrari finder & proximitor extraordinaire?

Me.

But I have to be honest, I’ll take one Ferrari and LV pic over 7 million same exact picture people post. One pic from one specific frame is enough. Do we need to see an animation of your movement? Do we need to see 120 pics from your last night out where you move your hand an inch every 30 pics? And your kid. We love your kid, but we can see how cute he is in the previous 30 pics you posted. Do we need 160 of them? Last but not least, people with an album called - ME. Really? It's your profile. You? What gave?

And to finish this impressive list of Facebook fuckery, my absolute favorite thing on this platform is when Facebook itself suggests my own fake profile for me to add as friend! That brilliance is hard to come by.

When I hear people say - Twitter is so boring and Facebook is so much better, that tells me about you. We all know Zuckerberg's motives for Facebook and he was there first so fuck us all, but in my opinion - Social Networks should exist to transfer information. Not for you or any of us to dwell on our inadequacies. FB and Twitter absolutely can not be compared.

Facebook is designed to give all the irrelevant and annoying people a place to feel important for a second. Twitter is a work of art. Twitter is a revolutionary platform where there’s no poking, no shitting, no manipulation, no people sticking their noses in your business; on Twitter, they are just spectators. The way it absolutely should be.

Twitter is a platform that created raw, unedited information that travels fast; it’s the platform that produced frank conversations, and it’s given people a chance (and space) to directly express their thoughts, no middleman.

Twitter single-handedly (well, with significant help from blogs) destroyed tabloid media, and set the information free. Facebook makes problems. Twitter solves problems. But what do I know.